To Catch a Predator

During the car ride I poured my guts out to Jen and explained the situation.  See up until this point no one knew anything or so I thought.  I was becoming a fantastic actress – I probably could have grabbed a part on a nice lifetime movie.  When we got to Starbucks I wasn’t sure if I was going the throw my guts up or get diarrhea.  I was that nervous.  I brought myself the mother of all coffees and waited.  When a 5’2 Asian girl came up to me I was confused.  She looked about 15 and strongly resembled the girl who did my nails. WTF!  When she said it was HER, I was stunned.  I was expecting a supermodel to walk in, not a child bride, and certainly not one that was banged up.  I became totally numb.  Instantly she started sobbing to me how she was so sorry.  I just let her speak.  I was mesmerized at how hideous she was.  What was Lucifer thinking?  All I could hear her saying was, “it was just blow jobs in the back of the parking lot” and "Lucifer said you were really mean, I wanted to help him."  I was disgusted, repulsed and embarrassed.  But I offered to buy her a coffee because I’m Italian and we like to feed people.  This meeting lasted about an hour and a half.  Poor Jen just sat there stunned.  This girl was a mere 17 years old, she was a cashier at K-Mart.  She had just graduated high school, I actually felt sorry for her.  She handed me her diary and showed me her cell phone because apparently Lucifer was “harassing” her.  I saw hundreds of texts from him, some coming in as we spoke.  It amazes me that I didn’t throw up all over the table at that moment.  But somehow I remained calm and when her phone rang, and it was Lucifer I picked up.  After Lucifer recovered from his confusion he realized this was it.  I told him I wanted him out and I was disgusted. 

What I did next is even more mind blowing to me.  I had my sister in law meet me, meet Angel Eyes as Lucifer referred to her as and after meeting HER, I went to my mother in laws alone.  For some strange reason I felt obligated to let his family know I was ending this sham of a marriage.  Despite the fact that his family was a walking episode of Intervention, I liked his mom.  And I loved his little nieces.  I was there to watch each of those girls come into the world, I didn’t want to just leave.  Till this day I still miss those girls.  When I walked into his mom’s house I was pretty sure I was going to snap, throw up or shit my pants.  Neither of that happened. I sat on the couch, my sister in law hugged me and my older niece came up to me and just said “Aunt Lisa I really miss you where have you been.  I can count to 10 in Spanish now wanna see” I held back my water works and listened and watched.  My other niece kept running back and forth with her newest stuff animals giggling.  I did NOT want these kids to have to hear the conversation with his mom, they had enough to deal with in their own lives.  When the kids finally left the room I sat and spoke with my mother in law.  I told her I wanted Lucifer out, how could I share a bed with a man who has cheated and cheated with a minor?  Yuck.  My mind was made up, Lucifer needed to get out tonight.

I went home to find Lucifer watching Lost just sitting there.  NO bags packed, just sitting there.  I was too tired to fight, I wanted to cry for gods sake and I couldn’t.  He begged me to let him say, promised marriage counseling, everything.  I said fine and Lucifer slept on the couch.  I went upstairs to bed and finally had my sob fest, you know the kind that you cry so hard you throw up until there is nothing left in your body.  It helped, but I still hated Lucifer. 

The next month or so is a total blur to me. I found a marriage counselor, we went once a week, Lucifer slept on the couch, I never slept.  The only time Lucifer and I ever spoke was at therapy and I would cry and yell at him, often calling him a predator  He disgusted me, I hated looking at him, I was embarrassed of what he had done.

Tomorrow we will talk about what it's like being married to someone who makes your stomach turn and why anyone would do that.  Once again, I hope I didn't put anyone to sleep.  I'm done for the night ; )